There are moments when it takes an effort to remember what life felt like before I became a mom. I think I felt less busy. I’m not sure. I was in a near constant state of busyness. It was where I chose to feel normal.
Having kids requires a parent to define a new normal. Since I was too selfish to give up any of my busyness, adding the kids’ interests meant I had to accept more activities, errands, driving around, and lots of waiting for them to be done so I could get to MY stuff.
Sure they could walk home from school. But not with a harp. Or a cello. Or a drum set. I’m lucky to work close enough and with a flexible (and very understanding) organization that offers me a chance to give the kids opportunities.
When I get time with one of them while the other is in an activity, I learn some important news. Today I learned my son got a date to the 8th grade formal dance. He’s afraid he’s going to screw up slow dancing. He politely declined my offers to practice with him. I saw a sensitive, nervous, and very relieved young man. (Girls had better treat this guy well. He’ll be a gem to whomever takes his heart.)
I saw my daughter on stage, performing a piece of music in the school talent show. I helped her start her transcription of chords onto the harp. I showed her how chords can change with one note instead of moving triads. Like fish to water, she did the rest of her piece in her room. She practiced until she got blisters.
I thought she’d place higher in the competition with a more “harpy” sounding piece with no vocals. She ignored my opinion. This is what she wanted to do. She did it her way.
I saw an artist.
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